Give me a break...

Let me preface this by saying my roommate is a nice guy. He means well... but if he doesn't get a clue, AND FAST, we are going to have major problems.

Now, as far as females go, I'm not the neatest girl you'll meet. I can be messy, so my house doesn't look like page 37 of the Pottery Barn catalog. But I try to at least be clean, and keep my house below the level of catastrophe. Bear in mind that I work a pretty demanding full time job and go to school part time, so when I get home I barely have the energy to clean up after myself, let alone clean up after my tenant and his guests. I've let a lot of things go. I understand that he's young and fairly clueless about some of this stuff. But after almost 2 years of living here, and various requests for him to help me maintain the house and keep it clean, I'm starting to get fed up.

Over the last 2 months, I have had 3 stand-offs with him - all seemingly unbeknownst to him:

1. The Toilet Paper Stand-off: Whenever the toilet paper needs to be replaced, rather than putting a new roll ON the dispenser like a normal person, my roommate puts it on the bathroom counter ABOVE the dispenser (and yes, we unfortunately have to share the bathroom). It drives me CRAZY. Absolutely bonkers. I think it's so stupid. So I left it. I left the toilet paper roll on the counter for 3 whole days. I just kept tearing off sheets from it, while leaving it there. But at the end of day 3, it made me so mad, I HAD to put it on the dispenser.

2. The Bathroom Trash Stand-off: So, sure, the bathroom trash can is not very big. All the more reason to take out the trash when it starts to get full. I'm as lazy as the next person, so I'll jam as much in there as I can before taking it out. But when I come home, and my roommate has had guests, and the trash can looks like this, I draw the line.



So I left that, too... for another 3 days. I even completely avoided putting trash in that trash can. The guy went down to the trash room a few times. I know because he had some recycling that he took down there. Did he bother taking out any of the other trash? No sir.

3. Stand-off #3, currently in progress, The Dirty Plate Stand-off: He and his girlfriend decided to make a peach cobbler or whatever yesterday. But they didn't have half the ingredients they needed, so I graciously allowed them to use my baking ingredients, as well as the baking pan. When they were done, his girlfriend just piled all the dirty crap into the sink, despite the dishwasher being ready to be emptied. Okay, fine. Whatever. At least it's in the sink, right? Well they shared a serving of said peach cobbler and then got ready to go out. I walk into the kitchen an hour later, and...



It's now the end of day 2, and that fork is practically GLUED to the plate from all the sticky, sugary syrup that's on there. Now, seriously... Are they not capable of cleaning this up? Trash what's on the plate, put the plate in the sink/dishwasher. It's not difficult. And this kitchen is not so big that this would be an onerous task. I woke up this morning and the plate was still on the counter. I left the house at noon and got home an hour ago (midnight), and guess what... Yes, my dear friends, that plate is still there. I REFUSE to clean it up. He's already in bed, but I promptly sent him a text, asking him to clean it up STAT. What pisses me off the most is that he was clearly in the kitchen while I was out... There are newly used utensils in the sink, and things on the stove have been moved around since I left this morning. So I KNOW he saw it there. He can't possibly be so blind as to NOT have seen it.

You know what? Maybe he thinks I'M gross. Maybe he thinks that I'm messy and leave shit everywhere. Maybe he feels like, since I'm gross, he can be gross too. Well guess what. I don't give a shit. Whether he thinks I'm gross or not, I own the place and I can do what I want. But don't make it worse. And don't expect me to clean up after you. And CERTAINLY don't expect me to clean up after your guests.

Major overhaul cleaning happening next week, and after that, I expect the house to STAY clean. If I have to hire a maid, he's paying for half.

My Regrettable Lunch

I stuck a fork in it, because it is DONE. In case you can't tell, this unfortunate specimen is a Hot Pocket - a LEAN Pocket, to be exact, and one more example of a reduced calorie/low fat/high fiber/whatever else food that I hate. Admittedly, I used to like Hot Pockets, but only the chicken, cheddar, and broccoli ones (which this one is supposed to be). But over the last year or so, whenever I go to the frozen foods section looking for something quick that I can keep as my "just in case I forget to pack a lunch or am too lazy to go out" lunch at work, I have looked for the regular Hot Pockets with chicken, cheddar, and broccoli. For some reason, though, they seem to only offer that flavor in the Lean or Croissant Pockets, and so I haven't bought them in a while. This time, I decided it was no big deal, and that it couldn't possibly taste THAT different.

Now, I don't know if it's because it's a Lean Pocket, or if maybe they've changed how they make Hot Pockets in general, or if they've changed the recipe of the filling. And I know that Hot Pockets are not exactly the most reliable food, and humans probably shouldn't be eating them in the first place. But I DO know that I paid $3 for a box of two Hot Pockets, and what I got was a cardboard burrito-ish thing filled with nastiness. I took two bites and I'm ready to trash it. The first bite was the gross surprise. The second bite was taken just to make sure the first bite was as gross as I thought it was. I guess you get what you pay for. Add this to my list of "Foods I Must Remember Not to Buy": Hot/Lean/Croissant Pockets.