The Post

I think I'm going to start sporadically doing "This Day in Pictures" entries, a la The Washington Post. Because I can tell you stories, sure, but sometimes a picture says it all. Yeah, I think I'll do that.

Circuit City

So I went to Circuit City this weekend to get my dad's birthday present. In order to make things a little less time consuming, I did the whole "order online and pick it up in the store" deal. Since we were at my sister's house, we decided to check the in-store availability at the Beltsville location. The website said that it was available, so we ordered it, waited about 45 minutes, and then went to the store. When we got there, I did the usual: went to the customer service counter, gave them my order number... The Circuit City employee then went to get my item. No, let me rephrase that. The Circuit City employee then went to GO LOOKING FOR my item.

Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought the whole point of ordering online to pick up in the store was to make things go faster. They tell you to give them 25 minutes, but that's really not very long. Ideally, you should be able to order your item, and by the time you've gotten ready, left your house, and driven to the store, 25 minutes has elapsed and your item should be waiting for you. Not the case here. After about 20 minutes of standing there waiting, this is what happens:

Circuit City employee (CCE): I'm sorry ma'am, but your item is nowhere to be found.
Me: I'm sorry, what??
CCE: We can't find your item anywhere in the store.
Me: But I bought it online and the website said it was in stock and that my order went through.
CCE: Well, we had one of them, but the store manager took it and we don't know where she put it.
Me: Well, where is the store manager?
CCE: She left for the day already.
Me: Well, can someone CALL her? I mean, I ordered it online to save time and because I need it for tomorrow. The website said it was in stock, and my order went through. You guys have $200 of my money and I drove all the way out here, and now you're telling me that my item is "nowhere to be found."
CCE: Okay, let me try and call her. (She disappears for another few minutes) Okay, she's not answering her phone.
(Then she stares blankly at me, as if I'm just going to say, "Okay, never mind then. I'll just go home.")
Me: Uhhhhhh... so what am I supposed to do, then?
CCE: Hold on... (disappears for another few minutes) Here it is.
(Lo and behold, she has the item I ordered)
Me: Thank you. Now, don't you guys have some sort of 25 minute guarantee or something? (Note that almost 2 hours has elapsed since I placed my order - 45 minutes before we left the house, 20 minutes to drive there, 20 minutes for her to NOT find my order, and another 15 minutes of trying to locate the manager.)
CCE: Yes, ma'am, we will give you a $25 gift card for the inconvenience.

So thank you, Circuit City of Beltsville, for being so incompetent. I now have a $25 gift card.

Now, I know I sound really unforgiving here, but I spent 7 years working in customer service, and there are so many things you can do for someone in that situation. Don't just stare at me when you tell me something like, you can't find my order. Give me some options on what I'm supposed to do, get your manager, ask someone else, SOMETHING. I mean, really, did she just expect me to walk out and be okay with the fact that I just spend $200 and was about to get NOTHING? Let's be real, people...

An Open Letter to Comcast

Dear Comcast,

As a customer who frequently has to call you in order to get my service restored due to various connectivity issues, I'd like you to please get a new repertoire of music. I am very very tired of hearing the instrumental version of "The Look of Love," and hearing the song in any other respect makes me want to blow my brains out. I'm sure you know that your customers have to call you over and over and over again, and are on hold for several minutes at a time, and the very least you can do is provide us with a litte variety every once in a while. That's all I'm saying. Thanks.

-Me

I must be doing something wrong.

So they finally hired a temp for me. She's doing all of my filing, sorting, scanning, shredding... all my bitch work, basically. Thank God. That crap was time-consuming and ridiculously tedious. So I'm more than happy to dump it on someone else.

But... um... why does she drive a Porsche? And not just any Porsche either. The Cayenne. Yeah. The big one... that starts at $43k. I drive a janky VW Jetta that needs new tires and for someone to re-attach part of the bumper. I must be doing something wrong. Maybe I need to go back to being a temp. And no, she's not married, so it's not like it's her husband's money. I'm such a hater. I know this. But come on. Why does my assistant have a better ride than me???

Pet Peeve #123043240932

Yeah, I have a lot of pet peeves. What can I say? I'm easily perturbed...

It really "grinds my gears" when people call you on business (i.e. a client or a vendor calling) and, instead of stating their purpose at the beginning of the call, just start talking about whatever it is they're calling about like you're just supposed to know who they are and to what they're referring.

I mean, come on. Do you really think YOU'RE the only person calling me and asking me questions, or that YOURS is the only issue I'm dealing with? No. I have several things on my plate, so I'd appreciate it if, when you call, you state your name, company, and an introduction to your business with me on this phone call rather than just jumping into whatever your issue is as if you're the only person I've spoken to all day.

Thanks.

Over-grooming

I work at a construction company. So you'd think people would be slightly more laid back about their appearance. Just a little bit... But over the 3 years that I've worked here, I've noticed it's just the opposite. I realized this yesterday, as I was in the ladies' room and caught one co-worker in the middle of her post-lunch grooming regimen.

When I walked in, she was brushing her teeth. Not an abnormal activity for many people after lunch, I'll admit. I figured once she was done, that'd be the end of it. No. She then proceeded to lightly freshen her face with some water, then re-apply her makeup. Then she brushed her hair. Then she straightened out her clothes. All this was followed by a light spritz of perfume. You'd think Brad Pitt worked in this office or something, with all the preening she was doing. Meanwhile, I was just trying to take a piss and blow my nose.

But she's not the only one who does this. I've seen several women do the post-lunch grooming... things outside of the normal brushing of teeth. Women will spend several minutes in front of the mirror here. Maybe I just don't get it because I'm such a sweatpants kind of girl... But the whole thing just seemed really unnecessary to me. I mean, you're at work and people have already seen you all day. Who else is left to impress??

Throwdown with Bobby Flay

Okay, so maybe I'm just biased because I'm not a fan of Bobby Flay. The guy annoys me, what can I say? I don't know exactly what it is about him...

Anyway, for those of you who don't watch Food Network like I do, he has this show called "Throwdown with Bobby Flay," wherein he finds people who are really famous in their hometowns for some specific dish and he challenges them to a "throwdown." Basically, he tries to create the same dish, but make it better than theirs. For example, this one woman was really famous in her town for her mac & cheese, so he goes to there and tries to make a better mac & cheese than her. The judges are 3 people, chosen from that town. He gets them on under the guise of putting them on a show on Food Network where they are the featured cook.

Now does this sound wrong to anyone else but me? I mean, here's this famous chef whose name everyone knows... nationally recognized, has several cookbooks, and is an Iron Chef... He finds people who are famous in their hometowns for one big thing. It's THEIR thing... their one claim to fame. First he tricks them into thinking they're going to be honored on Food Network by having their own episode on a show, THEN he proceeds to beat them at their own game and prove that he, a professional chef, is better than they are, a hometown cook. I know he doesn't win EVERY time (though, for the record, I've only seen a few episodes, and he HAS won all of them), but what the hell is he trying to prove???? That he is better than my next door neighbor? Doesn't his being on TV and getting paid big money already prove that? Must he also seek to humiliate regular people?

If you ask me, that's like Michael Johnson coming to my house and challenging me to a foot race. Who do you think will win? All's I know is that, if I'm famous in Rockville, MD for my fried chicken (for example... my fried chicken is good, but I'm not famous for it by any means), and Bobby Flay challenged me to a throwdown, I'd be downright pissed. How dare you attempt to steal my small town thunder?

Shame on you, Bobby Flay. Shame.