I don't get it...

I like art. Despite my obvious technical inclinations, I think things that are creative and beautiful and that evoke certain emotions. The National Gallery of Art is probably my most favorite museum in Washington, DC, and I could spend simply hours there, just gazing at artwork and taking it in.

That being said, I really don't get modern art. When I go to the NGA, I spend most of my time in the West Building. That's where the more classical art is: Monet, Degas, Vermeer, Whistler, etc. The East Building, I don't really dig so much. I guess I just don't know what classifies it as "art." I know most modern art is supposed to make some sort of a statement - whether it be a proud declaration of rebellion or an abstract conveyance of emotion. But a haphazard arrangement of Pick-Up Sticks or a pile of spaghetti doesn't feel like art to me. I went to a small exhibit with a friend relatively recently, where they displayed a wall of Ziploc bags filled with various things... some sort of "baggie project," I guess. Some of them, I understood... They were obvious. Like the bag that was called, "Looking for a Good Time," and contained a pack of cigarettes, so me beer bottle caps, a condom, and some matchbooks from clubs. But then there were others, like the one that had a piece of string and helium in it, or the one that just had creamed corn. Selling for how much? $100.

So I don't get it. Creamed corn is "art" because someone put it in a plastic bag and pinned it to the wall? And it's not even like it had some title that would show you that it was meant to be a metaphor or something, like "Humanity Today" or whatever. It was just titled, "Creamed Corn." Sorry, but I'm not paying $100 to purchase something that will soon be growing it's own colony of something else. Maybe that's why it's art... because it's the piece that keeps on re-creating itself... until finally you're left with partially decomposed corn, a swarm of gnats, and maybe a new strain of illness in your house.

I don't understand. Therefore, I invite all of you to help clue me in. Explain modern art to me. Like, what makes this a famous artwork:



I think my nephew drew something not unlike this on his shirt on Saturday. Except he did it by accident while messing around with crayons...